I started my journey of sexual exploration because I looked for something more than I was used to experiencing in my private life. Having attended numerous workshops on how to enhance sexuality and erotic energy, I want to share information about the key points that can make the work of tantra masseuse more meaningful and more beneficial for our clients. All these points explain how arousal can be integrated into the whole body by means of tantric massage, during solo self-pleasuring or lovemaking with a partner. If you practice it regularly and over time, you invite heightened erotic states into your private life and create a new habit in your body for experiencing more pleasure with your partner. I invite you to my “laboratory of pleasure” where you can explore ecstatic states and learn to create them by and for yourself.
Oxygen is the transport of pleasure. We need it to feel the depth and intensity of life. There are a lot of articles about the benefit of deep breathing and the role of oxygen in our health and well-being, I will not repeat them here. I would like to mention some benefits of conscious breathing when you receive tantric massage. First of all, you release tension from within your body, because breath works as self-massage and can reach those places that the masseuse’s hands cannot. Secondly, you get more energy in your system thanks to the increased oxygen. Thirdly, by playing with the breath you stay present in your body without flying away in your fantasies, and you may discover a pace and depth of breath which opens up new pleasurable sensations. Before starting the massage, our masseurs and masseuses can show you different types of breathing and it is up to you which of them you play with and for how long. There is no one and the only right type of breathing for everyone. We can try all of them and listen to our body’s responses.
There is a direct connection between movement and sensitivity. When you consciously move with some part of your body, your attention is placed there, since sensitivity grows where you place your attention. The movement also helps to heat up muscles, increase blood flow, and spread pleasure to the whole body. Besides, nerves do not function properly in tensed muscles (they can get hypersensitive or less sensitive). This means that when you move your body you release tension and create a comfortable environment for your nervous system. It can happen that some parts of the body have lost sensitivity because of some trauma or stress. Unfortunately, we accumulate tension and blocks during our life, losing flexibility and sensitivity year by year.
Moreover, the feeling of shame can limit our movement and take our attention away from our bodies. Tantric massage can serve as a perfect playground for improving your erotic choreography. When my clients say that this approach is very unusual and they might feel awkward at the beginning, I show them several simple movements that they can start with. After several sessions movement becomes easy, effortless, natural, and spontaneous. Besides, we can show the technique, which involves breathwork, the shift of tension, and relaxation in muscles. This in turn enables arousal to spread in the whole body very quickly.
The vibration of your voice can also spread arousal and sexual energy. It serves as a bridge connecting orgasmic vibrations with different parts of the body. From my experience, I can tell when for the first time I allowed myself to scream and play with different sounds while being aroused. I realized how much we try to control ourselves and restrict our pleasure. “What will neighbors think about me when I scream? Maybe I am crazy.” Shame takes our attention away from our body and our pleasure. The best way to cope with shame is to take the attention back to our body and to keep on doing crazy things until the negative feelings dissolve.
Being touched by another person who really cares about you is the most pleasurable thing that you can experience during the tantric massage. The quality of touch is really good because a giver is totally present and focused on how to bring you as much pleasure as possible. What I personally discovered is that caring touch can be very intimate and heart-opening. I usually recommend that my clients show the strokes that give them the most joy. Thus, if you ask for what you really want, you can connect with your deepest desires, build up more energy and unfold your sensual potential.
Variety of ways to bring more pleasure
When people make love, they often follow their habits, and arousal spreads in the body in a usual, habitual way. Sometimes we lose freshness and intensity because, by repeating the same scenario, we act more and more automatically without being fully present in our body. In order to be more present and experience more pleasure, we need to do something new, to break habits. That is why in tantric massage there are so many techniques and strokes, especially for the genitals, since we usually stimulate these parts of our body, in the same way, all our life.
While goal orientation creates tension and makes energy explode fast, relaxation, to the contrary, helps energy to expand and freely flow through the entire body. In order to enter altered, ecstatic states we need a certain cocktail of hormones in our body and a big amount of energy which is not possible to build up within 10-20 minutes. Most people do not know that these states even exist because they have the habit to orgasm too fast. You can start to learn to expand pleasure by pausing at a very hot moment and breathing and then continuing to build up energy again. Then again pausing, breathing, and coming back to playing with excitement.
Being witnessed as a sexual being
When you receive a massage you may experience all kinds of bodily reactions and emotions. There is no need to perform or impress anybody, hide arousal, or try to look very open. No matter how you act, you are fully accepted during a session. When someone mindful witnesses us as a sexual being, it strengthens our self-acceptance and self-confidence. Fears and tension dissolve and the body relaxes.
Honestly, it takes some time to integrate pleasure into the whole body. It happens faster if the client is ready to play an active role in the educational process and keeps on practicing beyond the walls of a massage studio. And it is not as easy as just relaxing and seeing what happens. But if you enter the path of learning and of developing new skills, you can expect life-changing results.
Categorised in: About Tantric Massage